In all relationships conflict happens. Avoiding it is not the goal. Rather learning how to quickly and completely resolve it, is. Here are four tools to adequately resolve a relational conflict.
- Tune in to what is going on emotionally with yourself and the other person. Emotions are messy and often make us feel out of control but they are vital in resolving conflict.
- Put yourself in the other person’s shoes. This is key to understanding the hurt another person may be experiencing.
- Acknowledge the other’s pain. Once the hurt has been expressed and heard, validation of the emotion is important. “I understand why you feel the way you do” rather than “I didn’t mean to hurt you, you shouldn’t feel that way.”
- Ask for forgiveness. Acknowledge the hurt that your actions may have caused and ask for or forgiveness. Being right is not the goal.